I'm just going to go over a boring topic on money. Well, whatever I say won't be credible because I probably didn't go through what everyone else have been through. But, I really don't care. I'm kind of fed up getting hate for caring. So its really up to you to decide.
Money and I have a hate/love relationship, starting from an early age. You know how when you have a older sister or younger sibling you have jealousy issues? You always think your parents care more about your siblings more than you. Well, for me I had this relationship with money. Kind of funny right? I couldn't help it. My mom was cheap. She would try to save every cent she could. She would do anything to save money. No matter how little the amount is. If it costs money, I would have to give up. I would always get huge shoes that never fit. Just wore clothes the school gave out. Sometimes buy pants. Sometimes buy tshirt. I would wear something other for a week and I wouldn't have anything to wear. I guess I had like 2 pairs of pants, and like 8 tshirts? We did eat out a lot, but it was in those cheap discounted food places. Really, you would be amazed how much semi good food you can get from discounted places. Hanging out friends costed money as well. Well, we screwed that. The thing is, I felt my parents would do anything for money. Even replace me with money. So, this is how I started hating money. Then a girl I liked, dated a guy just because he was rich. Actually fell in love with him and eventually had a breakup. It was the most painful thing I had to go through. She would believe a rich guy than a friend. Few friends joined the MLM system that would not really work. Even if it worked for them, they are harming others. So, I can't be friends with them. My principles are clear. I can't harm others, I can't also friends who would harm others. They joined because of money. Brainwashed because of money. And again they won't even listen to a friend because they are blinded by money. Blinded by love is more like blinded by money these days.Then again I have to love money. Yes I was blinded by money as well.
Because of my cheap mother, I've always thought more money was more happiness. However, I did realize money wasn't the answer to happiness. Its really about how you think. As long as you think in a positive way, you can be happy, no matter what kind of situation you are in.
However, back then I did love money. Well, I guess I do now as well but for very different reasons. My first love was in another country. I didn't have money to get plane tickets so this never worked out. That is the reason I loved money. I thought one day if I can get enough money, I can change things and have more control of my life. Well, that never happened as of now. I also thought I could be happier with materialistic goods. hahaha actually, the only reason I studied in high school was I wanted to gain independence from my parents. I dreamed of getting a room and being able to play computer games everyday. Well, that didn't happen and my interest changed.
Now, there is two different reasons. First, personal reasons. I need to dress well. It really helps my problem with low confidence. I mean it feels nice when I wear nice things. The second reason is I kind of want to help others. Well, actually I hate helping people because I really do get no gains from it. Better relationships with friends? Fk no. They forget everything and take it for granted. Really I'm not gaining anything. Absolutely nothing in return. It also pisses me off how people would listen when it involves money. The girl that was in MLM, she started listening when I told her I'll give her the amount she paid. That brought her back to her senses. I decided to reduce the price because right now isn't a very good time for me financially. But, I can't believe she still wants something from me lol. wtf she should be thanking me for bringing her into her sense. Well, I decided to make it multiple small gifts because it would be easier for me.
Sadly, I can't help myself. But I am stopping all this helping others thing this december. I'm tired of it. And I'm going to stop caring about others. That is my goal in life. Stop caring.
Anyways, what I really wanted to say was, money isn't everything in your life. Just make sure that you save enough to have some sort of emergency money. That is the most important thing. Emergency money. You really shouldn't be too greedy. Don't ever think of fast easy money. It always comes with a string. It could be losing family, friends, and relationships. Hard work does pay off really. The reason I have so much respect for my dad is because his parents were farmers who lost everything to gambling He came to Seoul with nothing literary. Somehow he managed to feed himself. Somehow he joined a company that send him to foreign countries. Somehow he climbed the social ladder. This somehow is all because he worked hard.
So stop becoming a victim of money.
Sorry this post isn't so well written, was very sleepy
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