I've met some really nice people these days. Some dude offered couple of cigarettes at the club.  Probably over heard our conversation. Well, not mine but my friend's. Everyone is going through a lot of crap. I don't smoke but I do when I feel like it. But smoking is bad for you. Just a side note, don't smoke before eating spicy food. Makes your food taste like crap. The other day I was in the Korean mart looking for medicine for pimples. I don't know been stressed and the pimples were going out of control. Anyways, this lady overheard my conversation with the person who works at the department store. She suggested me medicine and she even offered to give it to me for free if I lived near duluth. That was really nice of her and when I got back I googled the medicine. It costed like few couple hundred bucks ^^... Her brother probably used it but still.. she just offered me a couple of hundred bucks when I don't even know her. I talked to her on kakao talk and she was really nice.


Feels good inside.


Its true though, the mindset starts to colors your vision. Sometimes I struggle to see the goodness of this world. Its not like I don't try. I go out and open my eyes wide as I can, just to see something beautiful. Nothing comes in though. I don't know what to do about this. Imaginations seem to create hell. Only see the negativity of this world. Another thing is I seem to fear people. I mean there is no reason for me to fear them exactly. I'm bigger and stronger than most people. Its just that imaginations create people into creatures that are threatening. Its either this or imagine people dead. I'm hoping after the marines, my mindset would change. Maybe it would cure my vision of seeing people as monsters or dead. Maybe if I go to the marines, I could not lose to monsters. Maybe monsters would fear me.

I really don't know what to do with this mindset.