Thoughts & Experiences as a Trash collector

Just don't read this post since I'm just going to write whats on my mind. So basically, some people don't think. I'm calling them dumb. I'm saying they literally don't think. When reading a newspaper, doing homework or etc, they don't think. They just perform actions. As for me, I think a lot but its always repetitive and obsessive. Its interesting how I would state "I'm bored". People would say then I must not be busy. Well, for me, I'm doing something and still bored. Maybe its because I'm only partially focused on my work and having useless thoughts on the side. Thus, I'm in a state of boredom while doing work. Its quite funny how me and my sister is completely different. If there was a goal point A, my sister would go straight to the goal. As for me, I would go around the goal and get there eventually. I'm too aware of my surroundings that I'm not focused enough to get to my goals. Different ways of thinking.

I've also realized I can't tolerate few things in life. Its hard for me to imagine that something would last nor that humans are good. I'm thankful for those who were nice though. I remember those who've showed me kindness. Well, this reappeared in my mind because it was an extraordinary experience. Your dreams are filled with memories that were locked up inside you. For me it was all those people I've said good byes to. The kid who died when I was in kindergarden in Korea. Grace who was a Korean American girl who used to lead the gang in our neighborhood. Markus a black kid who had a issue with his tongue. A white girl who kissed me. The Korean American kid who stole my game pack. The kid who always mumbled when he talked. The Japanese girl who always get bullied in the bus. The Korean kids who've bought me a pocketmonster keychain. The kid who always fell when he walked. The pretty girl who was a daughter of a farmer.  So many that I do remember yet those who don't exist in my life. It all just came back in dreams. Then, there were those dreams where I got bullied. Always being the new kid suck balls. I mean you do get a lot of attention its just that those are negative. Those were nightmares. Sweated a lot. These were really interesting experiences. I forgot about them but they existed subconsciously. These extremely valuable data. Idk.. I kind of want my kids to read these posts at one point. Why? They'll gain experiences passively.

Another thing, I want to elaborate my experiences as a trash collector (TC). As most of you have read, I'm not in the position to become a TC. I come from a decent family and I have decent education. Plus, not a lot of teenagers do this. I did it because I felt like it. I wasn't going to stay in Korea anyways and I didn't know anyone there so I didn't care. It was an interesting experience. Its a different world that I've just entered. You feel great disappointment of how crappy the world is. I've noticed how many fucking coffee cups are on the street. Coffee is expensive and people don't know how to clean up after themselves. I did this during late night as well like around 2 am. So many drunk people on the streets. Then, I found out TCs are really competitive. I mean TCs get money by selling recyclable goods. They'll go through subways and collect newspaper people left at the train. Sometimes TCs would go to the extremes. They'll "raid" trashcans. Steal from marts/stores recycle bins. Sometimes they'll steal other people's properties. Say like there is a perfectly good bicycle parked outside of a house. They'll steal it. I found out cans and steel products are most profitable. You can get a decent earning. Well, decent earning as in you can feed yourself. I find it hard to imagine to find a place to stay. Unless you live in the illegally housings. (houses built on gov't ground and without permission).

Begging does make a lot more to be honest. You don't have to move anywhere just sit and beg. I think I've mention this before but a part time worker can get 5 dollars an hour. So if a beggar can get 5 dollars an hour, he makes enough. He probably can make a lot more if he targets areas that are populated with people who have more than enough or religiously obligated to help others. Also, if he proves that he is trying to break the cycle of poverty, like pretend to study or something, he probably can get more financial support.  So beggars probably make a lot more. As for TCs they don't make enough compared to part timers. I mean trash weights a lot. Its a lot more work compared to part timers.

So, if I would rank, jobs

1. Beggar
2. Part timer
3. TCs

Living as a TC wasn't pleasant. Trash was sometimes disgusting. Man... I should have focused on working on computer science and getting rich. -.-... Well, my parents were in Malaysia and I didn't have a stable place to stay so I probably couldn't study anyways. Just another thought... its really weird how I never been in a real relationship but yet, I did technically love a lot of people. Its really weird how easily I can read people's sadness. Maybe its not that hard to read people's sadness but how many people care. Its kind weird that I care though since I'm not compassionate.